The Beauty of Patience

As we walked past the beautifully manicured yard, I couldn’t help but admire out loud the gorgeous multicolored impatiens in full bloom. No sooner were the word out of my mouth, when my four-year-old grandson questioned my praise for the flowers. “But Nonie,” he said, “isn’t impatience a bad thing?”

Yes, sweet boy, it is. His words were convicting. Earlier that week, I had found myself impatient with a family member. The day before, I’d been impatient about a situation at work. That morning, my impatience had been directed inward. I was frustrated with myself.

And what about my impatience with God? Those times when unanswered prayers cause me to question his power or his love?

Impatience is indeed a negative thing. Left unchecked, it can lead to others. Impatience is fertile soil for unkind words, poor decisions, discouragement, and doubt to blossom.

The Antidote to Impatience

No matter how hard I try, I cannot simply produce patience. It must be cultivated as a Fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5: 22-23) and an overflow of love. In fact, the antidote for impatience is love. 1 Corinthians 13:4 tells us, “Love is patient, love is kind” (ESV).

In John 13, we are commanded to love: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another”  (John 13:34 ESV).

The key to following this command is found in the words as I have loved you. We love because he first loved us. We grow in patience because he is patient with us:

The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. (Ps. 103:8 ESV)

The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance. (2 Pet. 3:9 ESV)

But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life. (1 Tim. 1:16 NIV)

The Example of Patience

Jesus, the image of the invisible God, modeled this patient love for us in all his earthly relationships. But never moreso than in his relationship with Peter.

Peter, impatient for Jesus’ earthly kingdom to begin, lashed out in anger, cutting off Malchus’s ear with a hot-tempered blow of his sword. Jesus lovingly told Peter to put away his sword. (John 18:10-11). My own impatience can prompt me to pick up the sword of unkind words. But if I listen carefully, I can hear Jesus lovingly tell me to put them away.

Peter, impatiently wanting to step out of the boat and into his leadership role, was able to briefly walk on water. While his eyes were fixed on Jesus, he actually did it! But when his gaze shifted to the wind and the waves of his circumstances, he sank. Jesus, in loving patience, reached for him and pulled him from the churning waters (Matt. 14:28-31).

My impatience with myself also begins with a shift in my focus: me taking my eyes off Jesus, distracted by something scary or shiny.

Too often, this drift to distraction occurs while I am praying. This is when I recall Peter in the garden. Twice, Jesus asked him to watch and pray with him, and twice, Peter fell asleep (Matt. 26:40-43).

However, none of Peter’s failings kept Jesus from seeing Peter’s potential. In fact, Jesus’ loving patience towards Peter was instrumental in growing Peter into who God created him to be:  the rock upon which the church was built.

Peter’s journey reminds us that we, the church, are called to exhibit that same loving patience. This has never been truer than now, when fear and division cause impatience with others to abound. The loving patience Christ demonstrated toward Peter is our model for encouraging one another, patiently cultivating in others the potential that God sees in them.

The Beauty of Patience

We know that if someone bumps into us while we’re holding a cup of coffee, coffee is what spills on them. In the same way, when we are filled with the knowledge of God’s patient love for us, that is what spills on others when they bump into us.

They are splashed with patient love rather than impatient irritation.

While lovely impatiens and unlovely impatience are on display for all to see, patience can often go unnoticed. It is the harsh words unspoken, the sword not drawn, the turned cheek. Patience is silent trust while waiting for an answer to a prayer that feels long overdue. But whether visible to others or not, God sees. The patience that blooms in our hearts is beautiful in his sight.

Ann Skalaski and her husband of thirty-three years live in Gainesville, FL. They have moved a dozen times, raising three children along the way. They have added a son-in-law, daughter-in-law, and two precious grandsons to the mix. When she is not packing or unpacking, Ann enjoys serving as a mentor mom for MOPS International, joining Bible studies, meeting friends for coffee, taking long walks, and watching lots of football. Ann is passionate about using lessons from her journey to help other women navigate change in their own lives.

Photograph © Jeremy Horvatin, used with permission