We Look the Way We’ve Been Loved

Fourteen years ago I perused a store’s toy aisle, looking for a stuffed animal for my second son. He had some nighttime fears, and I wanted to get a dog to comfort him. I found a cute black one with sweet eyes. Being a wiser parent than I’d been with my first child, I bought two of the same dog in case the first one got lost.

What I didn’t realize then is that when a child loves a stuffed animal, there is no replacement. Not only are kids too smart not to know the difference, but they know whom they have loved so well. The extra dog, however, was handy when our third son was born. He always wanted his older brother’s stuffed dog, whose name was Allie, so I brought out the extra dog. He became known as Bob. Both dogs were so special to our sons that they were like our other children.

I can tell you in an instant which dog I find lying around. They were loved differently, so they look different. Allie was loved gently and tenderly. My older boy imagined she was real and treated her with the utmost care. He wanted her to have frequent baths in the washing machine, and he never let her get dirty or be mistreated. She had a life-size doghouse, and she slept with him every night. He loved her wholeheartedly, sacrificing his time to put effort into her care.

Bob looks different. His eyes are partially chewed off because my son gnawed on them as a baby. Bob has his own (disgusting) smell from being drooled on at night and not receiving many baths (because “He doesn’t like baths, Mom”). Bob looks rough compared to Allie, but this is because he was loved with a fiercer love. He has been taken outside in the dirt, been slept on, and traveled to many places. He has been loved deeply and without reservation.

Both dogs remind me of how God loves us. He loves so tenderly that he gave his own Son to rescue and redeem us. He loves so fiercely that he came to earth to be our Savior, snatching us from death and the scars of sin. His love, then, should change the way we look. It should make us stand out in the world, and people should notice that, yes, we are the same as they are, but we look different. We are changed from his relentless love. Sometimes we may appear to have been gently loved, coddled, and pampered. Other times we may appear to have been through a great deal. Both can be testimonials of God’s love for us.

Sometimes, though, we forget that we should look the way we’ve been loved. Instead, we blend right into the masses. Yet we’ve been loved with an everlasting love. We’ve been loved with an unending and unescapable love.

Living as if we’re loved doesn’t mean we’ll always have a happy demeanor or a pep in our step, or even a smile. Life is hard. If, however, we remember to whom we belong and who loves us fiercely, it should cause us to live differently.

I want to live this way. So many days, however, I walk around with sad eyes and a frown, looking like I haven’t been loved at all, as though I’m an orphan who’s been abandoned. But I want to remain hopeful while giving hope to others. I want to remember the grace I’ve been given and offer grace. I want to wear a smile and have an attitude of thankfulness because of all I’ve been given.

Most of all, I want to love others in a way that changes them. I want to look back at the people in my life and see a little bit of my influence and my care reflected in who they are—every day. I want to remember God’s great love for me and choose to walk in it, not forgetting, and not living as if I don’t have this love.

First John 4:19 says, “We love because he first loved us” (ESV).

My boys and their sweet little stuffed animals have reminded me that I can choose to snuggle up to the Father’s love every day. I can allow it to mold and shape me, and I can give it away.

Gina Grizzle is a wife, mama, and aspiring writer who has a passion to share her life with other women in order to encourage them to be the best they can for the kingdom. At home in East Tennessee, Gina loves to fluff her nest, squeeze her sweet kids, and read books. She blogs at ginagrizzle.blogspot.com.

Photograph © Khanh Steven, used with permission