A Different Kind of Valentine

Confession time. My name is Shelley. I write romance books, and I used to never celebrate Valentine’s Day.

When you write romances for a living, the month of February is usually a busy one. Booksellers are open to book signings, librarians invite you to speak to their patrons, and people who usually proclaim that they don’t have time to think about romance start asking you questions about your novels. It’s like everyone suddenly realized that all these books are about feelings and overcoming obstacles and, well, love might have something worthwhile to say after all.

All this means it was almost embarrassing when I’d sit on a panel of authors and have to answer questions about my favorite way to celebrate the big day. I’d squirm in my chair, practically in a cold sweat while I tried to think of something interesting that wasn’t a lie. Usually, my answer was an epic fail and everyone would look at me like I was some kind of Valentine’s Day Scrooge.

Everything changed when my kids entered middle school and started getting really busy. I had begun to realize that my years with them at home were limited. And so, because I wanted them around more, I came up with a Valentine’s Day activity for our family. It was a Valentine’s Day scavenger hunt.

I thought it was going to be great. I made up clues that had to do with each member of the family. Things like, “This is where Lesley used to hide her Halloween candy” or “This is Arthur’s favorite snack.” Then I typed them up and glued them on strips of construction paper. If I had time, I made sure everything rhymed. One year I got a book of Valentine’s knock-knock jokes and made everyone take turns reading them.

At the end of the scavenger hunt were the prizes: gift bags with some candy inside. Maybe a t-shirt. Nothing fancy or expensive. It was the game that was the prize.

Full disclosure: I was an elementary school teacher, and now I’m a writer. That means group games that involve rhymes and construction paper are fairly easy for me to do. But it still took me a while to make everything up–and yes, I always had to try it out before hiding all the clues.

That very first year, there were six clues. After pretty much threatening everyone in order to get them home on Valentine’s Day for dinner, I presented my surprise and handed my husband the first clue. The next thing I knew, everyone was up and running through the house. My usually unimpressed preteens were disappointed that the hunt was so short. I counted that as a good thing.

The next year, we went to eight clues. By the time my son was a senior in high school, we had twelve clues. The game had even gotten kind of hard (there were now clues outside, which meant tromping through the snow) and competitive–the quest for bragging rights was real. Our beagle, who would usually only sleep thirteen hours a day, even got into the spirit. She’d run around with everyone and bark madly.

I’d even begun making a ‘special’ dinner: Pizza and a heart-shaped cake. My Valentine’s Day scavenger hunt had become a tradition. Instead of concentrating on hearts and flowers and romance and chocolate, we concentrated on us.

Eventually, the kids left for school, and the Valentine’s Day scavenger hunts were put on hold. But now, even though they’re married with kids of their own, they sometimes ask for a rematch whenever we’re together.

So, if you happen to be like me, and maybe don’t get too excited about Valentine’s Day, I suggest you start your own scavenger hunt. Or, if you have no time for rhymes, clues, and construction paper, maybe play a board game. Go on a hike. Just do something that’s a little bit special and shakes up your month for an hour or two. Who knows? You might end up realizing (like I did) that there are a great many ways to show your love for people you care about and it has nothing to do with Hallmark-movie/ Instagram-worthy moments. Or, say, romance books.

Valentine’s Day can be your opportunity to show the people in your life that you care to spend some time with them. Which, I believe, is the most precious gift of all.

Shelley Shepard Gray is the New York Times and USA Today bestselling author of numerous romantic fiction series and mystery novels, including the Seasons of Sugarcreek series, the Sisters of the Heart series, the Families of Honor series, and others. She is a recipient of the RT Book Reviews Reviewers’ Choice Award. She has written more than eighty novels, translated into multiple languages. Her latest book is Sycamore Circle, published by Blackstone Publishing. More information can be found at shelleyshepardgray.com.