Transitioning Well
I had to read the email twice before it sank in. After months of trying to buy a home remotely in a ridiculously competitive real estate market, we were “under contract.” Our transition from Florida to Kentucky was officially underway.
I finally had a picture of where I would be living—literally a picture! The house hadn’t been listed, so there were no professional photographs to scroll through. We made our offer based on a twenty-minute FaceTime showing. But I did have one picture!
Coincidentally, my Bible reading for that morning in Deuteronomy was about the Israelites’ transition from slavery to the promised land with a whole lot of years of wilderness in between. Don Carson has this to say about their transition:
“Although the book of Deuteronomy constantly looks backward to the exodus and years of wilderness wanderings, it also looks forward: the people are about to enter the promised land, and certain things will change. In times of transition, one must grasp the distinction between what should change and what should not.”
His words captured my attention, causing me to ask myself, “In my current transition, what should change and what should not?”
Accepting What Will Change
If I am honest, I don’t want anything to change. I like my life just the way it is, thank you very much.
I was recently reminded that I am not alone in my aversion to change. Arriving at the gym, I found that a substitute would be leading our class. Her style was not what the participants were used to. About a third of the class left within the first five minutes, roughly another third continued with the workout but didn’t always follow along with the leader, and the final third were “all in.” It’s not hard to guess which group benefitted most from the workout that day!
I know if I am going to transition well to my new life, I need to be all in—willing to let go of what I have now and embrace what God has for me in Kentucky.
“Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” (Isa. 43:18-19 ESV)
I need to accept what will change. The climate and culture will be different, and I will have to acclimate. But the hardest change for me is the daily reminder of being “unknown.” While going to church or simply running errands, I will not experience the thrill of running into someone I know. This is hard for an extrovert!
Before we moved, our small group from church had a going away dinner for us. It was bittersweet. There was amazing food, wonderful conversation, and meaningful fellowship, followed by deep grief on the drive home. Knowing these special people will be forever in my heart but no longer part of the weekly rhythms of my life, I felt grief. Transitions are hard.
Accepting the loss of special friends, favorite restaurants, and all that is familiar is the first step towards embracing the new things God has for me.
What Should Change
My fear of the unknown should be replaced with anticipation fueled by confidence in God’s faithfulness. Rather than determining now what should change in this transition, I want to slow down and wait for God to show me the changes he is orchestrating. This is hard for me. I like having a plan for my new life. So, one of the changes God is asking me to make is to just trust him and let the future unfold.
I also sense that God is asking me to stop relying on other things to provide the peace, joy, and contentment that I should find in him alone. My life in Florida has been easy and filled with good things. Sometimes those good things can start to become ruling things, things I wrongly believe I need, deserve, or am entitled to. Paul Tripp puts it this way: “Remember the biblical principle of idolatry, desire for a good thing becomes a bad thing when that desire becomes a ruling thing.”
The Israelites wandered in circles in the wilderness for forty years because of their idolatry.
What Should Not Change
My confidence that God has ordained this transition should not waver, even when the road gets a bit bumpy. God ordained that the Israelites would inherit the promised land, but their journey was far from easy!
In my desire to make friends and fit in, I cannot compromise my beliefs. God warned the Israelites not to worship other gods once they entered the promised land. This is a warning for all of us when we experience transitions. While I embrace the new, my allegiance must remain firmly rooted in the God of all my days.
Finally, my commitment to be a part of a local church should not change. Although there will be new faces in whatever church we join in our new town, it will be part of the body of Christ. That never changes.
and her husband of thirty-three years live in Gainesville, FL. They have moved a dozen times, raising three children along the way. They have added a son-in-law, daughter-in-law, and two precious grandsons to the mix. When she is not packing or unpacking, Ann enjoys serving as a mentor mom for MOPS International, joining Bible studies, meeting friends for coffee, taking long walks, and watching lots of football. Ann is passionate about using lessons from her journey to help other women navigate change in their own lives.
Photograph © Erik Mclean, used with permission
