What Does It Mean to Live in Peace?
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” (Rom 12:18 NIV)
Recently, I posted a tongue-in-cheek statement on Twitter. My satire landed well with those who got the reference. Those who didn’t, however, were another story.
I expected some on the other side of the debate to come for me, and oh, they did. What I didn’t expect was that those I might have considered “my people” would respond with vitriol over perceived slights and offenses. Their words stung, because I felt misunderstood and even deliberately mischaracterized.
I don’t think it was coincidence that a few days later, I was preaching on this chapter of Romans.
“Welcome the person who is weak in faith—but not in order to argue about differences of opinion. But why do you judge your brother or sister? Or why do you look down on your brother or sister? So let’s strive for the things that bring peace and the things that build each other up.” (Rom 14:1, 10, 19 CEB)
Paul wrote to a deeply divided Roman church. One group, the “strong,” felt no need to keep laws from a Jewish heritage they didn’t share and fully embraced their freedom in Christ. Consequently, Paul charges them with treating their Christian siblings with contempt. Literally, they’re disdaining—treating others like they are beneath consideration.
“You’re so legalistic.”
“How can you be such a prude?”
“Get with the times.”
“We’re better Christians than you are.”
The other group, the “weak,” felt tied to their traditions, laws, and routines so much that it defined them as believers. They responded to their siblings with judgment. Sitting in judgment in Scripture usually implies the person is playing the part of God—a precarious position.
“We care about the Bible more than you do.”
“We’re just telling the truth.”
“You’re compromising.”
“We’re better Christians than you are.”
Sound familiar?
Humans take sides so easily. It makes us more comfortable. More safe. More secure in our status quo. It’s simple to assume that our “side” is the right one, and that deafens us to the truth that sometimes, our side is also throwing stones and showing contempt. We don’t recognize it because we secretly enjoy the effect.
I didn’t expect it from “my people,” but I should have. Anyone who engages in outrage before seeking to learn and understand can fall into the trap of contempt or judgment. It doesn’t matter if the outrage might even be justified. Paul agreed with the strong—but he told them that being right doesn’t excuse being a jerk.
I learned something important from that Twitter debacle. I can get outraged. I can feel contempt or judgment. Yet choosing that before I opt to recognize the ties of Christian love means I’ve put my need to feel justified before God’s priorities.
I’ve chosen to place myself above a person whom Christ calls my equal. I’ve not chosen the way of peace.
I’m not saying we ought not confront terrible thinking or fight for what is just. We must do this sometimes, for the same reasons. If the image of God in a human is being attacked, God’s people should respond. Yet before we respond, Paul suggests considering.
- Are my words intended to hurt or to clarify?
- Is my heart feeling prideful about this or peaceful?
- Am I assuming the best of this person or sitting in judgment?
- Do I need to be right more than I need to love right now?
This is why Be the Bridge, a site for racial reconciliation, requires people sit and listen for three months before commenting. It gives them time to get past their knee-jerk reactions and defenses. It offers a chance for real dialog and peace-making.
I’ve reinforced my resolution on social media to think first, comment second. Pray first, ask questions next, share my thought last. It’s a small way of ensuring that, as far as it depends on me, I’m walking, and tweeting, in peace.
Scripture for Reflection
“But now that faith has come, we are no longer under a custodian. Christ has set us free for freedom. Therefore, stand firm and don’t submit to the bondage of slavery again. You are all God’s children through faith in Christ Jesus. All of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek; there is neither slave nor free; nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” (Gal. 3:25-9 CEB)
You were called to freedom, brothers and sisters; only don’t let this freedom be an opportunity to indulge your selfish impulses, but serve each other through love. All the Law has been fulfilled in a single statement: Love your neighbor as yourself.” (Gal. 5:1, 13, 14 CEB)
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.” (James 1:19-20 NIV)
Reach for More
This week, try intentionally listening to a podcast, reading a post, or following someone you know won’t agree with your views. Listen without judging. Hear without devising comebacks. Write down five things you have in common. Pray for that person.
Prayer
Lord, we are selective people who want our safe status quo. Help us to open our hearts and minds to others and hear them out. Help us, as St. Francis prays, to seek not so much to be understood as to understand. Amen.
is a writer, speaker, pastor, mom of three, and author of five books. She likes to travel, grow flowers, read Tolkien, and research her next project. She believes in Jesus, grace, restoration, kindness, justice, and dark chocolate. Her passion is partnering with the next generation of faith. Jill blogs at jillmrichardson.com.
Photograph © Ravi Sharma, used with permission
