One Word, Given by God

Five years ago,  author Jimmy Page gifted me a copy of his book, One Word that Will Change Your Life. Since my previous New Year’s resolutions never quite made it through the year, the notion of focusing on one word to inspire change and growth was appealing. Guided by this short book, I followed the three-step plan of preparing my heart, discovering my word, and then living out my word throughout the year. While the results have varied from year to year, I can truthfully say that this approach has fostered more growth than my New Year’s resolutions and goal setting in the past.

Discovering my word has been the tricky part each year. The authors stress, “We don’t pick our word; God shows us.” But if I’m honest, waiting on God does not come easily for me. Each year I silently wonder whether “hearing from God” is really just me choosing a word because I have grown impatient and have a really good idea.

My Word in 2020

But God is always so much bigger than my “good idea.” This year, he made that especially clear. In the summer of 2019, I moved to a new town. The renovations on our home were complete by Thanksgiving, and we had settled into our new church. Our football teams’ invitation to play in the Orange Bowl meant I would be spending the holidays in a hotel, but I was determined to make hospitality a priority in the new year. “Gather” felt like the perfect word to focus on in 2020. I can hear you laughing, right?

During the first week of January, long before the word “pandemic” had been uttered by anyone in the media, God redirected me with Matthew 9:13: “Go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, and not sacrifice’” (ESV). As I read those words, I instantly knew that my word for 2020 was “mercy.” And I was not happy about it!  I had already ordered-and hung–an adorable “Gather” sign in my dining room. I had plans swirling around in my mind for tea parties, backyard cookouts, dinner parties, and hosting a small group.

But I knew God was telling me that “mercy” was the word he had for me. I began studying biblical references to mercy. James 2:13, “Mercy triumphs over judgment” (ESV) caused my heart to stir, so I ordered a new sign and placed it on my mantel. But I still could not comprehend how this would intersect with the year of hospitality I had planned for 2020.

Then COVID-19 hit. “Gathering” was forbidden by municipal order, and my husband began working from home. Within days, I had a new appreciation for the sign on the mantle. I had been working from home for over twenty years and had a well-established routine, but my working style was very different than my husband’s. Sadly, it was far too easy for me to default to judgment when I observed these differences. All the “togetherness” we were experiencing was like pouring gasoline on the flames of my judgmental spirit. All the while, the sign on the mantel seemed to mock me.

God’s Faithfulness

I am so grateful for God’s mercy toward me, and I know he desires for me to be merciful to others–beginning with my husband. I wasn’t sure what that should look like in the current work-from-home situation, but I knew who to ask! I prayed specifically, asking God to give me a picture of what it would look like to withhold judgment and extend mercy. God, in his infinite mercy, reminded me of something that happened at a women’s retreat I attended years ago.

While I do not recall who the speaker was or what she talked about, I do remember the young, very pregnant wife sitting next to me. At one point, when we stood to sing, a paper fell out of her Bible. Knowing how hard it would be for her to bend down and pick it up, I quickly grabbed it, noticing the handwritten heading, “What I love about my husband” at the top of the page. As I handed the paper to her, she smiled and said, “I had to make a list, because sometimes, I forget.” That is mercy: a strategic plan to redirect judgment.

As the year played out, 2020 provided countless opportunities to show mercy to others. The divisions of this year—whether political, racial, or mask–versus-no-mask—were all opportunities to opt for kindness and compassion over judgment. Our sovereign God knew COVID was coming. He knew shelter at home orders would give me ample opportunity to practice choosing mercy over judgment. He knew there would be divisions throughout our country.

More personally, he knew the exact places I struggle most. He was calling me to grow where he knew I needed to grow, loving others with the same love he has lavished on me. Even those–especially those–with whom I disagreed. When he shifted my One Word for 2020 from “gather” to “mercy,” he left no room for me to doubt that he had indeed chosen my word. I can’twait (but I will!) to see what word he has for me in 2021.

What About You?

What are your goals for 2021? Do you long to experience personal and spiritual growth? If you have never considered allowing one God-given word to direct your focus, I would encourage you to give it a try.

The authors of One Word That Will Change Your Life offer three steps for finding and applying the word that’s meant for you. Don’t short-change the process.

1. Look within. Set aside time to prepare your heart to hear from God. Preparing your heart creates fertile ground so that the word God plants in you can produce good fruit.
2. Look up. God has a word for each one of us each year based on our individual journeys. Trust Him to give you your word.
3. Look Out. You will see opportunities daily to apply your word and experience growth.

It is important to keep your word front and center throughout the year. For me, a cute sign is a visible reminder. Other tools might include creating a screen saver, keeping a journal, finding a song that reminds you of your word–the possibilities are unlimited. So is the potential for your one word to transform you, making your life more purposeful than ever!

Ann Skalaski and her husband of thirty-three years live in Gainesville, FL. They have moved a dozen times, raising three children along the way. They have added a son-in-law, daughter-in-law, and two precious grandsons to the mix. When she is not packing or unpacking, Ann enjoys serving as a mentor mom for MOPS International, joining Bible studies, meeting friends for coffee, taking long walks, and watching lots of football. Ann is passionate about using lessons from her journey to help other women navigate change in their own lives.

Photograph courtesy Ann Skalaski