God Is Trustworthy

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” (Prov. 3:5-6 NIV)

I experience recurring panic-inducing dreams where I’m in a car I can’t control. It could be that the brakes don’t work, or I’m steering but for some reason, my feet can’t get to the pedals. Often, the car is going too fast, and I’m in a cold sweat trying to dodge other cars and obstacles. Sometimes I sideswipe at least one car and cringe at the damage I know I will have to pay for while also dealing with a traffic ticket. I’m always so glad when I wake up and realize it’s only a dream.

I hate that out-of-control feeling. I’m powerless to stop the destruction I sense is coming.

I think that’s why I enjoy schedules and routines so much. I have a sense of control and an idea of what the future holds. But in reality, it’s a tenuous grasp. I can’t really schedule everything that’s going to happen and expect there to be no surprises or fluctuation in my plans. For one thing, I have a family—a husband, two children, and a cat—all of whom have their own agendas that don’t often perfectly align with mine.

There are days when someone is sick, and their care takes priority for the day. Other times, they need an emotional connection, which cannot be pushed to a more convenient time.

All of this teaches me to hold my plans loosely. Choosing to attach my life to others means allowing for inconveniences and a looser hold on my time. God has never wanted me to be in control of my life. He asks me to let go, to lose my life to him, to willingly release the reins into his hands.

Intellectually, I know this, but my flesh struggles. I know God is trustworthy. I know he has good purposes for me, but I sometimes struggle to live as if these things are true. It’s my fear that maybe God isn’t who he says he is, that he will not come through for me when I need him. Or worse, that his plans for me are different than my plans for myself. Maybe my dreams are different from what I was created to do. Am I willing to set aside my own goals for God’s? Can I trust that his plans are so much better?

That’s the crux of this struggle—do I truly and fully trust God? Can I surrender my whole self to his care and embrace his purpose for me?

I’ve battled the desire to choose his will over mine for so long. I admit that sometimes, I don’t fight that hard to get past my unwillingness to submit. But God is trustworthy, faithful, and patient, and he continues to invite me to join him in loving and serving the world. I don’t always choose what’s right, but God is always there, gently nudging me in the right direction. He’s faithful even when I’m not. And it’s this constancy that draws me to him, changing my heart and my desires. It piques my curiosity and increases my desire to see what will happen if I let God lead. May he continue to pursue us and lovingly show us that he’s trustworthy and that his plans for us are good.

Lord, I am thankful that you’re in control. Forgive me for the times when I act like my present and future are fully dependent upon me. Remind me that you are faithful and that your plans for me are good. Help me to remember all of the ways you have provided for me in the past. May I find rest and peace in your competent hands. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Scripture for Reflection

“Come now, you who say, ‘Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit’—yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, ‘If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.’” (James 4:13-15 ESV)

“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?” (Matt. 6:25-27 ESV)

“Those who know your name trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you” (Ps. 9:10 NIV).

Reach for More

Do you struggle to trust God in all areas of your life? Remind yourself of God’s faithfulness through Scripture. Think of all of the ways he has been faithful in your past. Share an example of God’s faithfulness with us using the hashtag #tgtreachformore.

Megan Byrd is a mother of two who loves reading, writing, traveling, and introverting. When she’s not at a class at the gym, she can either be found perusing used book stores for great deals or exploring her new town of Asheville, NC. She is the author of Between Us Girls and can be found chronicling her reading journey @meganbyrdreads on Instagram or writing about life at meganbyrd.net.

Photograph © Estée Janssens, used with permission