Do You Long for Contentment?

A few weeks after I invited a new friend to my house for lunch, she graciously offered a return invitation. Her home is larger than mine—I knew that, and I thought I didn’t care. But she did say it was 9,000 square feet. That’s a lot of square feet. At the time, I was contemplating remodeling to make our kitchen bigger, but I figured her kitchen was probably a little bigger than mine would ever be.

The morning of my visit, I told my husband, “Mark, you’d better pray that I don’t covet today. I’m going to Janet’s house for lunch.” He just said, “If you do covet, that’s your problem.” He didn’t sound at all sympathetic. As a physician, he does have a good bedside manner, but he’s also pragmatic.

Some days I need pragmatic, and Mark was right. Any tendency I have to covet is my problem. And maybe he responded that way because I’d made him feel bad, as though I was saying he wasn’t providing everything I wanted.

When we aren’t content, it might not grieve the person we live with, but I’m sure it grieves our Father God. He’s probably thinking, Look at all I’ve given her. She’s not looking in all the right places for contentment. If she would only see what she does have. But I don’t want to break God’s heart, and maybe that’s the best motivation I can have for cultivating contentment.

That morning, I prayed I wouldn’t covet my friend’s house. After all, coveting makes me miserable. I also thanked God for all he’d given me. (I thanked my husband for all he’d given me, too.)

God doesn’t mind grandeur. Look at the temple he designed. But he did answer my prayer. I didn’t covet a thing that whole day, and what a day it was! I loved every minute with every ooh and aah as I admired and enjoyed Janet’s home. But Janet didn’t want me to love her stuff; she wanted me to love her. I’m so glad I mostly loved my friend.

The apostle Paul wrote, “Godliness with contentment is great gain” (1 Timothy 6:6 NIV). God desires that we be content not only because it gives him joy but because we’re better for it. He also made us to live in the garden of Eden, but just like we stepped out of it, I can step out of contentment—every fifteen minutes!

God’s intention is for our good. It’s like when I tell our girls, “If you get sleep, you’ll feel better. And it adds to all of our contentment when you do. Insisting that you do isn’t trying to punish you or burden your life; it’s to bring you joy.”

In the same way, God tells me, Sue, be content. I’ve intended for you to function better when you are. I will bring you joy. Let me do that for you.

So why are we not content?

It all starts with wrong thinking, thinking someone, something, or some situation will bring us peace and joy. We could call these the “wrong somes.”

Someone. Something. Some situation. Next time I feel a little less than content, I need to remember that no “some” can ease my mind totally. It’s not a matter of none will but that none can provide contentment. Lauren Flake reminds us, “I can find true peace and contentment only in keeping my eyes fixed on Jesus.” Too often, instead of fixing my eyes where they need to be fixed—on Jesus—I go to a someone or something or situation to bring me joy. But that source turns empty after a matter of days or even minutes.

The prophet Haggai recorded these wise words from the Lord: “You have planted much, but have harvested little. You eat, but never have enough. You drink, but never have your fill. You put on clothes, but are not warm. You earn wages, only to put them in a purse with holes in it” (Haggai 1:6 NIV).

Now, I love purses. I go to thrift stores for the pure joy of finding a purse. But I wouldn’t take one home if it had a hole in it even if it were free. That purse would be useless.

We may think, even secretly, that if we had a different house, a different husband, more godly children, or better health, we’d be more content. And certainly, we can think that way about money. But then I remember billionaire John D. Rockefeller’s answer when a reporter asked him how much money is enough. He said, “Just a little bit more.”

I’m no Rockefeller, but I can have that same attitude: “If only I had a bit more [fill in the blank], then I would be content. Then I would have no reason to complain. Then I could praise God on a consistent basis.” I could call that the “if-only-things-were-different” syndrome.

The world says true contentment comes when our needs are met and someone or something is responsible for meeting them. But Scripture says true contentment comes from God. He made us for himself, so we are complete in him. I love this statement from the Desiring God website: “God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him.”

Do you want contentment? Find God. And he can be found. Another old prophet wrote, “‘You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,’ declares the Lord” (Jeremiah 29:13 NIV).

And God loves giving to his children: “God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work” (2 Corinthians 9:8 NIV).

Sounds like a purse with no holes.

As a retreat speaker, Bible teacher, or workshop leader, Sue Moore Donaldson loves sharing who God is with whoever comes her way. For her, intentional hospitality for the sake of Jesus is a joy and a privilege, and she knows it can be learned! Sue encourages you to find the reality and joy of knowing God through his Word – and that can happen at any kitchen table or back porch or BBQ. Sue and her husband Mark reside in San Luis Obispo, California where they’ve raised three daughters. Find more from Sue at Welcome Heart.

Photograph © Finn Hackshaw, used with permission