Find Your Own Rhythm and Flourish

“Find your own rhythm,” we’re told. But in a world full of comparison, how is that done—especially with a million messages bombarding us each day?

“Strive for greatness!”

“Nothing is impossible!”

“Ten steps to success!”

“Three keys to a wonderful marriage and family!”

“Follow me, and I’ll give you all the answers!”

It’s exhausting. Instead of finding our own rhythm, we copy someone else’s, which leads to an underlying discontent. And then we attempt to fill that void with another message we grab from the internet or TV show or book. Eventually, we’re exhausted, overwhelmed, and feeling guilty because we can’t keep up. We burn ourselves out from trying to keep up with everyone around us.

Finding Your Own Rhythm

What if we all found our own rhythm and did what God created us to do?

A few weeks ago, I sat listening with tears welling in my eyes as my daughter played the keyboard. We were the only people in the room, but in one single moment, all the world seemed to stop as worship filled the room.

Something about getting lost in a moment is utterly beautiful and alluring. I sat in awe as my daughter found her rhythm, as she discovered the very thing that gave her sweet release. Under her breath, she counted the beats to keep time with the music. One. Two. Three. She was deliberately counting as music filled the room. Not once did she glance over to see what I was doing. She continued counting to her beat.

The truth is, those who are counting to their own beat both create worship and naturally bless others around them. And so I exhaled and smiled, knowing that rhythm is found for all of us only when we count to our own beat.

Flourishing in Your Rhythm

Comparison crushes your rhythm. In her book Rising Strong, Brené Brown writes, “Stay in your own lane. Comparison kills creativity and joy.”

The Lord works within each family, within each person, and has a plan and purpose for us all to fulfill. In 1 Peter 2:9, Peter wrote, “You are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light” (NIV). Called, chosen, and set apart for a purpose is the mark on each child of God.

God has a mold for each person, for each family. We’re free—not in chaos or confusion—when we’re not trying to fit into the mold he created for the person next to us or the family next to ours. Instead, we begin to flourish in our own rhythm.

But we can’t find our rhythm if we’re caught up in comparison. Our rhythms are not others’ rhythms. Lord, help us walk to our rhythm, not her rhythm.

Maybe her rhythm is to make homemade bread and stay home with her babies, but yours is to hire help while you pursue a dream that burns within you.

Maybe her rhythm includes working while her kids are in school to provide for her family, but yours is to keep house and use your gifts to bring life to the environment you call home.

Maybe her rhythm includes extended periods of time to reflect and read, but yours includes only pockets of time to breathe and pray.

Maybe her rhythm is to cut back on activities to be home more, but yours is running to many outside activities.

Maybe a nap is in your daily rhythm—no guilt or shame in that. Or maybe you need to add a hot bath to your nightly routine—your new rhythm. But no matter what, when we stop judging each other’s rhythms and start keeping time with our own, a sense of community develops and relationships deepen.

My new rhythm includes being content where I am, no matter the season—knowing life is a journey, trusting that God will connect the dots, resting in the understanding that he knows the beginning to the end. And I’m discovering that rest doesn’t happen by just slowing down or stopping. True rest comes when we find the very rhythm God created us for. Rest will come; I’m sure of it. But for now, our only labor is to lean into the Holy Spirit and ask what he would have us do in this season.

Remember, Jesus communed with the Father to find his rhythm. Often, he went against the crowd knowing his Father was calling him in a different direction. Take pleasure in knowing you can just do what God has called you to do, and trust him to make something beautiful out of your life.

Lea Turner is a wife and mother of five, three who grew in her belly and two in her heart through adoption. She is on a journey of resting fully in the love of the Father by letting go of striving and walking fully in her identity. She has a passion to inspire others to work from a place of rest rather then strive from a place of anxiety. Lea blogs at LeaTurner.com.

Photograph © Brooke Cagle, used with permission