What Would You Keep?

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. (Philippians 4:8 NIV)

At the start of every year, we often spend time assessing the previous one. We make lists of everything we want to change. My list usually consists of eating healthier, exercising more, writing more consistently, yelling at my kids less, and more date nights with my husband. Most of my goals have to do with weeding out bad habits: I need to exchange sugar for more whole foods. I want to decrease time wasters and increase productivity.

Honestly, I need to make adjustments in all these areas. However, after making my New Year’s goals list, I generally feel regretful about the wasted year instead of hopeful about the future. The could-have-been thoughts bombard me—if only I’d made better choices, seized more opportunities, and watched less Netflix.

This yearly analysis is a meta-example of my general attitude. I lay my head on my pillow at the close of most days with regrets and complaints scrolling through my mind like movie credits. The list of everything I would change comes easily. I reassess my reactions and think of what I should have done or said. My imagination plays with the possibilities of what could have been.

Rarely do I take time to reflect on what I wouldn’t change. My days aren’t all bad; they each hold moments of joy, unexpected blessings, good decisions, and meaningful connections. If I were to make a list of all these good things, it would be longer than the list of regrets.

In our key verse, Philippians 4:8, Paul encourages believers to think about the positives. The Greek word for think is logizomai, which means “to consider, take account, weigh, meditate on.” This is a fact-finding, list-making mission. He wants our focus on what’s right instead of on what’s wrong. When you look back, search for what was true, lovely, and admirable. What did you do with excellence? What would you not change?

The Practice of Preserving the Positive

This practice of preserving the positive takes discipline. I tend toward perfectionism. Anything less than perfect leaves me wondering what I can do differently next time to ensure a better outcome. This constant second-guessing makes it difficult for me to highlight what went right.

I can easily tell you how any given weekday morning went horribly wrong. I hit snooze one too many times. I didn’t lay out clothes the night before, so getting dressed was a scramble. One of the kids woke up grumpy. My breakfast consisted of six goldfish crackers and too much coffee. Raised voices, late departures, and forgotten supplies round out the list of the terrible start to my day.

With intentionality, though, I can look at my morning routine from a positive perspective. The passage I read in the Bible speaks directly to my need. My child says “thank you” when I hand him a packed lunch. High school girls giggle and share stories on the way to school that I wouldn’t normally get to hear. A friendly exchange on the elevator sets a positive tone for my workday.

The subtle shift in perspective from what I would change to what I would keep can transform my complaints into gratitude.

What Would You Keep?

Look back over the last year. Sure, you would change some things if you could, but what would you keep? Remember what brought you joy—a reunion with an old friend, an accomplishment at work, a picnic on a beautiful day, a novel that moved you. As you look toward the future, celebrate what went right in the past. Release regret and embrace hope.

Let’s make this annual review our daily practice. Something will go wrong today, but so much will go right. As the sun sets, sending shades of orange and pink into the vast canvas of blue, let the beauty inspire you to remember the beautiful parts of your day. Maybe even take the time to write down what you wouldn’t change. Philippians 4:8 says, “The best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse” (MSG). The practice of preserving the positive can change a tired, grumbling heart into one of joy and celebration.

Scripture for Reflection

I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart;

I will tell of all your wonderful deeds.

I will be glad and rejoice in you;

I will sing the praises of your name, O Most High. (Psalm 9:1–2 NIV)

Do not allow this world to mold you in its own image. Instead, be transformed from the inside out by renewing your mind. As a result, you will be able to discern what God wills and whatever God finds good, pleasing, and complete. (Romans 12:2 VOICE)

Reach for More

Following our key verse, Philippians 4:9 says, “Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you” (NIV). Our daily practice of preserving the positive can inspire an attitude of gratitude in those around us. We set an example when we choose to celebrate the good instead of complain about the bad.

One simple question can change complaining into thanksgiving: “What would you not change about today?” Consider incorporating this question into your family mealtimes, conversations with your kids in the car, even during a chat with a coworker. Social media also provides a powerful platform for positivity. Share a snapshot of the best and beautiful part of your day. As we spread positivity, hopefully others will put it into practice.

Kelly Smith is a small town girl who married a small town man. They have three children. In the quiet minutes of her day, you will find her at the keyboard or curled up with a book–always with coffee. Kelly believes we are created for community and loves to find ways to connect with other women who are walking in the shadow of the cross. She blogs at mrsdisciple.com.

Photograph © Ivana Cajina, used with permission