Leading by Example
When I was a teenager, I was a day-camp counselor one summer. I was one of the younger counselors, and I was so excited to lead a group of kids. When I received a review from my supervisor, however, it included the word bossy. I was appalled, followed quickly by ashamed. It was one of my first real chances to lead, and I had led too aggressively when I should have followed. I led from a position of power.
We all lead differently. Some of us are quiet and lead through humility and service. Some of us are louder and lead from the front. But we all lead in some way. As I’ve matured, I’ve learned we would all be more effective leaders by leading from a place of gratitude.
Leading Our Families
Viewing all of life through the lens of gratitude can change our hearts and attitudes. I think this is required to be an effective leader. When I think about how I lead in my family, I realize my actions teach my children how to be leaders. I recently finished reading Paul David Tripp’s Parenting: 14 Gospel Principles That Can Radically Change Your Family. He challenges us to think about what kind of authority we’re displaying. Is it loving and correcting? Or is it harsh and merciless? This is important to discern, he says, because we’re showing our children a view of God’s authority through our parenting.
I was challenged as I realized that far too often, I’m harsh and irritated with my children, as well as toward my husband. As Christians, we are ambassadors for Christ. If we take the role seriously, though, we can know we’re displaying the characteristics of Christ to everyone with whom we come into contact.
No matter what our families look like, most of us have things to be grateful for. I have three beautiful children, and I’ve realized God placed them in my care to shape them into functional citizens. I shouldn’t be irritated when they interrupt something I’m doing with a need. They need guidance, help, and care, and it’s a blessing to serve them.
Of course, we are imperfect sinners and won’t always get it right. When that happens, though, do we apologize? Do we admit our mistakes and seek grace?
Leading at Work
I began working at a global accounting firm straight after college graduation. By God’s grace, I’m still working there eighteen years later. I have had multiple roles, but I took on a significant leadership role about three and a half years ago.
The way I received the role was entirely a God thing. I simply shouldn’t have been given the job based on some of the circumstances. It took me a while to really settle into the role because I was so shocked to have it. I’m still surprised sometimes when someone asks if they can copy me on an email to increase the chances of action.
This summer someone on a team I oversee made a reasonably significant mistake. It was the kind that, upon hearing about it, made my stomach seem to drop. I thought, I think I’ll still have my job once I communicate this to my superiors. (I do, by the way.)
While the mistake wasn’t a personal one, it still fell to me to own it, communicate it, and drive the action plan to fix it. We had discussions around what had happened to cause it, but the focus was on how we could avoid it happening again in the future. I wasn’t out to shame the responsible party. Instead, we all worked together to put prevention processes in place. When I had to tell our national leader, I just owned it, said how sorry I was, and then walked through our plan to move forward.
I believe that, because of my gratefulness at being in a role I love, working with people I love, and doing my best to do my job as an ambassador for Christ, I was able to both extend grace, encouragement, and compassion to my team and humbly own the mistake and work toward fixing it with those to whom I am accountable.
Leading Our Communities
We hold many roles in our communities. We may serve at church, simply be friends with our neighbors, and hold positions on committees or PTAs or boards. Regardless of our roles, as ambassadors for Christ, we should be counting our blessings throughout and leading others toward Christ in those interactions.
One of the many principles in the Bible is the concept of grace and truth. When we’re discipling those in our communities, are we leading as friends willing to speak truth wrapped in grace? I believe Christ calls us to do just that. In so doing, we should remember to be seeking heart change and not just behavior change. We should be digging into the root cause of harmful behavior: always unbelief in the heart.
At our church, we meet in small groups called Missional Communities. Let’s say one of my friends came in and said, “Goodness, my boss was awful today. I can’t believe she treated me that way. I work so hard, and I don’t deserve that.” It might be easiest for me to join in and say, “For sure. I can’t believe she was such a jerk.” If I’m leading with gospel intentionality, though, I would be wise to gently challenge my friend, asking if she remembers that everything she does at work is for Christ and not for her boss. While her boss may not have been kind, could she have been having an unusually hard day? Was she in need of grace?
When we look at Christ’s time on earth, we see he led from humility. He led as a servant. He led from a place of gratitude, understanding he was God’s ambassador and that his purpose was to reveal God to humankind. What a beautiful example we have to follow, as he asks us to lead in our families, workplaces, and communities.
is a Jesus follower, wife, mom of three, church planter, finance director, and lover of sarcasm and deep conversation with friends. She also loves camping, rafting, skiing, sewing, and having people over. Amy blogs with her husband at fringechurch.com.
Photograph © Jehyun Sung, used with permission
