Do You Have a Victim Mentality?
In the parable of the vineyard workers in Matthew 20, Jesus tells the story of a landowner who hired workers at various times throughout the day. He told the first workers he hired he’d pay them one denarius each. He told the workers he hired later that he’d pay them “whatever is right.” At the end of the day, the first workers thought their compensation would change when the landowner paid the later workers that same one denarius. They were wrong.
Jesus said, “‘When the first ones came, they assumed they would get more, but they also received a denarius each. When they received it, they began to complain to the landowner: ‘These last men put in one hour, and you made them equal to us who bore the burden of the day’s work and the burning heat.’ He replied to one of them, ‘Friend, I’m doing you no wrong. Didn’t you agree with me on a denarius? Take what’s yours and go. I want to give this last man the same as I gave you. Don’t I have the right to do what I want with what is mine? Are you jealous because I’m generous?’” (Matthew 20:10–15 CSB).
My desired response is to side with the workers. Yes, I concede they got what they agreed to receive, but that wasn’t fair. They worked twice as long and should receive twice the payment! Yet while the world encourages egocentric responses, God calls us to choose differently. As I continue my work to stay ready and available for God to move in and through me, he is working on both my head and my heart.
One thing positioning myself for readiness has revealed is that my responses (heart) and knowledge (head) aren’t always aligned. This isn’t to say they run perpendicular to one another, but if I am to believe Proverbs 16:9 (“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord established their steps,” NIV) and Jeremiah 10:23 (“‘Lord, I know that people’s lives are not their own; it is not for them to direct their steps,’” NIV), my responses need to rest on the plumb line of my convictions even in hard seasons.
Here are three biblical examples of a ready response:
Joseph
Genesis 30–50 documents the life of Joseph. Joseph’s brothers sold him into slavery, where he unjustly spent years in jail. When he was finally free, he remained separated from his family. When Joseph saw his brothers again, his response revealed that reliance on God through the years had developed character traits that reflected God’s grace and love. Joseph saw God’s hand in his circumstances.
In Genesis 45:5–7 (NIV), Joseph tells his brothers, “Do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you. For two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five years there will be no plowing and reaping. But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance.”
Job
Job 1:8 (NIV) says, “Then the Lord said to Satan, ‘Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil.’” Satan asks for permission to torment Job, and by chapter 37 Job has lost his children, livestock, farm crops, workers, friends, and health.
God finally speaks, reminds Job he is the creator of everything, and asks, “‘Will the one who contends with the Almighty correct him? Let him who accuses God answer him!’ Then Job answered the Lord: ‘I am unworthy—how can I reply to you? I put my hand over my mouth. I spoke once, but I have no answer—twice, but I will say no more’” (Job 40:1–5 NIV).
Paul
In 2 Corinthians 11:23–31 Paul reminds the church at Corinth of times and events in his life after his encounter with God on the road to Damascus (Acts 9). He was:
- imprisoned and exposed to death.
- flogged, given forty lashes minus one by the Jews (five times), beaten with rods (three times), and pelted with stones.
- shipwrecked (three times), and forced to spend a night and a day in the open sea.
- constantly on the move, in danger from rivers, bandits, fellow Jews, Gentiles, and false believers, and in the city, in the country, and at sea.
- without adequate sleep, food, water, clothes, and warmth.
Can we all agree these three lives are not ones we would willingly choose? If anyone could justifiably cry out, “It’s not fair!” cases can be made for Joseph, Job, and Paul to do so. Yet they all chose a different response. God directed their paths just as he directs mine. Just as he sought obedience and faith from them, he calls me to a faith-filled response as well.
I’m learning that praying the Psalms when I cannot find my own words is one of the best tools I can access to find my plumb line. God’s guidance is plentiful when I begin with trusting his direction.
I say to the Lord, “You are my Lord;
apart from you I have no good thing”…
Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup;
you make my lot secure.
The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
surely I have a delightful inheritance.
I will praise the Lord, who counsels me;
even at night my heart instructs me.
I keep my eyes always on the Lord.
With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken.
is a football coach’s wife and mom of two energetic boys. She strives to encourage those around her to pursue their best lives in Jesus whether she is near the game field, in church, or at the local coffee shop. As a writer, Beth has been striving to find her voice through seeing Jesus in the ordinary and extraordinary of daily life. She blogs at Lessons from the Sidelines.
Photograph © Noah Buscher, used with permission
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