Normal Is Relative

I’ve been accused of being a lot of things in my life, but normal has never been one of them.

I will admit, on the surface, my husband and I together look pretty normal. We have a house, kids, and a dog. We follow a couple of sports teams, and we eat at the local pizza place weekly. We work hard, play harder. Sometimes we just lie on the couch and eat an entire barrel of cheese puffs.

Some things I do or don’t do, however, set me apart, making a personal normal for which I am grateful.

For me, normal is being genuine and putting people before programs, not getting caught up in “stuff to do,” but focusing on “people to do stuff with.” It’s being sober, being in control of my body and mind. It’s being intentional in my actions, in my interactions with others, with no ulterior motives or expectation.

Normal is paying attention when my instincts direct me to a different path, even if it’s one few have traveled. I know my instincts come from the Holy Spirit, and I have vowed to never ignore that prompting, even when I want to hide. When in doubt, I look to my Savior for influence, wisdom, and example. I trust I will be put on the right path for me.

Jesus knew normal was relative. In his day, he was not the norm. He knew anger was good only when it was righteous. He knew love and forgiveness, mercy and grace were the order of the day, regardless of what others thought. He also knew he had to keep walking his path, putting one foot in front of the other until his mission was complete. He didn’t let hearsay or taunting control his emotions. He didn’t allow others to change his position or mind just because they were strong in their arguments. Jesus never spent time worrying about what people had or didn’t have, except for salvation. He wasn’t concerned with logic, either, because little of what he did could be explained with logic.

I don’t expect you to believe this way of living is always easy for me. It isn’t. Sometimes people can be cruel, and their words and actions cut me to the very core. I have suffered many times for doing the right thing. My version of normal is occasionally no picnic. Sometimes I want to fight what the Holy Spirit wants from me, but that’s mostly out of fear of the unknown, of what lies ahead. I should have learned a lesson here at some point, but I still worry sometimes. I worry about what people will think or say when I do something they don’t understand. I worry about the impact my decisions will have on others who may not believe as I do. But at the end of the day, I can do only what I’m led to do. Sometimes it sets me apart from other people, and that’s all right.

If, especially as you strive to follow Christ, you’re feeling a little less than normal, relax! Normal is relative, I assure you. It has taken me a lifetime of comparing myself to others to figure this out. Some days I rejoice in being set apart. I’m glad to not worry about what perception others have about me. And some days I wish fitting in were a little easier. However, I am not willing to risk my relationship with Christ to experience something I believe would be a disappointment.

So I cling to Psalm 4:3, knowing the depths of its truth for me:  “Know that the Lord has set apart his faithful servant for himself; the Lord hears when I call to him” (Psalm 4:3 NIV).

I know what it means to be set apart, and I am okay with that.

Angie Dailey lives in rural Ohio with her husband and family. She spends her best and most important time with the Creator of the Universe and with her family. She loves coffee, Jesus, and gardening, but not necessarily in that order. Angie blogs at angiedailey.com.

Photograph © Bethany Beams, used with permission