Loss of Hope, Loss of Love
Do you ever get the feeling something bad is about to happen?
In my younger years, I loved to watch horror films. Something about the anticipation of disaster thrilled me. The innocent girl walking down the steps into a dimly lit basement. The fateful decision to enter the creepy woods while a killer is on the loose. In each scene the music was key, letting me know when something bad was about to happen.
I don’t watch horror movies anymore. With age and wisdom came the realization that I don’t have to be afraid if I don’t want to. Real life is scary enough, isn’t it? Ten minutes on the Internet will invite real-life horrors right into your world. Terrorist attacks, racism, cancer, human trafficking, poverty. While my life isn’t touched directly by these heart-breaking events, the scary movie music plays in the back of my mind, warning me that something bad is always about to happen.
I consider myself an optimist, so this foreboding hopelessness disturbs me. When I turn to Scripture for the solution to my loss of hope for the future, I find insight in 1 Corinthians 13: “Love always hopes.” Hope is birthed from love. Could my loss of hope be because I’ve lost love?
Paul’s description of love convicts me. “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.” When I look closely at my relationships, I see my struggle to truly love those closest to me. Do you feel it, too? I am all too often short-tempered, bitter, or put out.
Consider those times in life when love rules: cross-eyed puppy love, your first internship, newly wedded bliss, the rush of love for your newborn right after giving birth. Hope flourishes. The orchestra in our minds plays something akin to a lighthearted minuet, and we smile as we look toward the future.
Fast-forward to today. Reality silences the trilling of the flute and the energetic cadence of the xylophone. We question our career choices. The daily-ness of marriage begins to include sharp answers stemming from pent-up resentment. And the kids. Need I say more? Somewhere along the way, love faded, taking hope with it.
If I want to hope for my future, it starts with pursuing love today. “Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” Choose to respond in kindness. Serve others with no expectation of reciprocity. Forgive offenses and then let them go.
We are the conductors of the orchestra in our minds. When love is lost, we cue the spooky music. Or we can live out love and keep the melody light and hopeful. Which tune will you play?
*All Scripture references taken from 1 Cor. 13:4-7, NIV.
Kelly Smith is a small town girl who married a small town man 17 years ago. She has three energetic blessings, ages 1 to 11. Her favorite indulgences are coffee, reading, writing, and running. Kelly believes we are created for community and loves to find ways to connect with other women who are walking in the shadow of the cross. She blogs at mrsdisciple.com.
Perhaps our blissful outlook on marriage before we get married is a blessing. I’m sure if I had known the challenges my husband and I would face in marriage beforehand, it’s quite possible I would be single today. I mean, I knew it was not easy for other marriage but I guess I thought we’d do it better. Ignorance is bliss… In reality, bliss doesn’t keep us married. In the face of reality, doing the hard work to love does bring with it hope. I appreciate how you intertwined the two.
True! The horrors might cause us to become the runaway brides! Oh the joy we would miss, though!