Is Your Perfectionism a Gift or a Hindrance?

As a twenty-two-year-old fresh out of college, I remember sitting through a job interview, nervous about what questions I’d be asked. First came the general experience and get-to-know-you questions. Then came the one I had heard before, the one we all dread.

“Name one of your strengths and one of your weaknesses.”

The strengths part always comes easy. We all tend to focus on our strengths anyway, and want to make sure others know them, especially during a job interview. Being open about our weaknesses is a different story. We usually don’t want our friends and family, let alone a potential employer, know our weaknesses. So I spun the question a little, the way they say you should. You know, state a weakness that could also be viewed as a strength.

I picked perfectionism as my weakness. I explained how my perfectionism can be negative when I become consumed with tasks being done just right. I went on to explain that although perfectionism is a weakness, it can be a strength when it pushes me to accomplish, complete, and excel.

Done! I answered the question, but did not expose anything uncomfortable.

Over the past ten years, I’ve thought about my perfectionism many times. I still see my perfectionism as strength most of the time. I see how it pushes me to keep my house in order, to have meals planned out before grocery shopping, and to keep my to-do list in shape. Lately, though, I’ve also realized how much my perfectionism can be a weakness when I let it hold me back.

This desire for things to be perfect can prevent me from even starting. If I’m fearful of letting my perfectionism down, then I tend not to create, do, serve or act at all. I fear that things won’t turn out well, or that I won’t do something well enough.

I have a friend I like to craft with. She has a “make it work” free-spirited personality that can be stressful for me at times but also serves as a good balance to my perfection-obsessed ways. She starts, creates, deals with problems or mishaps as they come, and moves on. She makes things work and actually accomplishes her goals. Whether my friend finds a flaw in her finished project or not, she is creating and finishing something, whereas I have many unfinished projects.

Perfectionism doesn’t just hinder my crafting. I also see how it prevents me from serving in areas I’m not as experienced in, like inviting others over to my house if things aren’t perfect.

I’ve started to see how the space I give my perfectionism actually relates to the Pharisees in Jesus’ time. There is always an appropriate time for perfection, but I have to make sure that the reason I’m trying for perfect is not out of a desire to please myself or others.

Is my heart for being perfect the result of a desire to serve God and others well? Or do I want my accomplishments to point back to me?

“For am I now seeking the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ” (Gal. 1:10 NIV).

“And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites. For they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward” (Matt. 6:5 NIV).

[Tweet “Perfectionism can serve as a strength or as a weakness, depending on our hearts.”] If we are followers of Christ who struggle with perfectionism, we need to make sure we use it as a gift to serve him, not allow it to be a trait that hinders us from glorifying him.

Lauren Douglas is a wife and mommy to two little ones. She enjoys reading, crafting, and exercise. Most of her days start and end with coffee. She prays that her home and life are led by her faith in Christ. Lauren blogs at faithledhome.com.

Photograph © Bethany Beams, used with permission