How to Spend Yourself

A number of years ago, I found myself feeling bored and restless. I was actively involved in my church, taking care of my family, serving at my children’s school, and spending time with other Christian women in a small group Bible study. These activities were all worthwhile, yet my sense of discontentment remained. Was there something more? Was God calling me out of the places where I had once been content in order to stretch me and show me another part of His Kingdom?

The more I read about Jesus, the more I saw His heart for the poor. Even in the Old Testament, God consistently called His people to care more deeply for those who were struggling: the broken-hearted, the lonely, the oppressed. I vividly remember the first time I read these words in Isaiah 58:

“If you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday. The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.”

 How was I to answer this call? When I saw stories on the news about impoverished people in war-torn countries, I prayed for mercy. I sent money to the Red Cross in response to natural disasters, sponsored children through Compassion International, and gave to our church mission programs.

If I was honest, I really didn’t run across many hungry or poor people in my comfortable suburban circles, so I offered my money and my prayers where and when I could. Is this what God meant when He said to “spend myself” on behalf of the hungry? How could a suburban mom “satisfy needs of the oppressed” when the needs were so many and felt so far away? Could there be more?

God answered my prayer. Through a serendipitous series of circumstances, I found myself escorting a group of young teenagers to a day shelter for homeless and poor individuals in our community. On our first day there, I had the privilege of visiting with Jim. Jim and his wife Sharon had fallen on hard times and were living in the woods that summer.

As I listened to Jim’s story, I was struck by his deep gratitude to God for the recent gift of a new tent—a tent that did not leak when it rained. He considered this all the evidence he needed to believe that God was looking out for him and his disabled wife.

I was blown away by Jim’s faith, his serenity, his sense of humor, and his utter dependence on God’s provision in the face of overwhelming difficulty. Would I have had the same positive attitude in similar circumstances? I couldn’t quit thinking about Jim’s testimony. Before I left that day, I filled out a volunteer application and became part of The Lamb Center community.

In the years since I began serving weekly at The Lamb Center, I have been stretched. Initially, I was overwhelmed by my sense of inadequacy in the face of such great need. What did a wealthy suburban mom have to offer someone living in the desperate circumstances many of these folks find themselves in?

Simply put, I have myself to give. With the help of the Holy Spirit, I can offer my friends at the shelter my love, my listening ear, the touch of my hand, a warm hug, a moment of prayer, or a kind word. I have my unique life experiences to offer—the losses I have survived, the pain I have felt, the joy of knowing God and the wisdom of following Him. I have my love of God’s Word to share and the knowledge that the promises within are for every single one of us, regardless of our circumstances, our resources, or our past.

[Tweet “I have me to offer, a gift no one else can give.”]

In the years I have spent with my friends at the center, I have received more than I have given, just as God promises. Through my involvement in this holy community, I experience God’s presence and I am changed. God takes my willingness to spend myself, and like the story of the loaves and fishes*, He multiplies my humble gifts to feed His hungry children. I pour myself out and I am filled. The Kingdom of God at work!

My story is true for each one of us. We each have unique gifts to give to a hurting world, but we must be willing to leave behind the comfortable and the familiar. Our stories can bring healing to others, but only if we are willing to share them.

The Lord says He will guide us always, but first we must say yes!

*See Matthew 14:13-21, Mark 6:31-44, Luke 9:10-17 and John 6:5-15.

Kelly Johnson is a counselor, writer, speaker, and advocate. She leads a weekly Bible study and serves as chair of the board of directors at a local shelter for the homeless. Married to her high school sweetheart, she is the mom of two college-age daughters. Kelly writes about life, faith, and her newly empty nest at kellyjohnsongracenotes.com.